Learning by playing

LEARN BY PLAYING
By Carol HardingPlay is a child's "work" because it accomplishes so many developmental tasks. When children play they learn about themselves and the world around them - how to relate to others and how to communicate. A baby's playtime is equally important for parents. Playtime allows a parent and baby to share glee, and draws a parent into a baby's magical world. Tickle-tickle, peek-a-boo, and those made up interactive games are not only fun, but also bond baby and parent. The smiles and giggles that emerge make the simplest activities rewarding. Parents appear to be genetically "wired up" to enjoy being with babies. First movements, burps, and yawns provide parents with lifelong memories. A baby's first sounds teach parents to talk in a special language (called "motherese") that helps develop language skills. It is during playtime that parents and babies come to know each other and learn to communicate. Kicking, reaching, touching, gumming, wiggling, and babbling are all ways that infants and toddlers experiment with body sensations and motor movements. Swiss Professor Jean Piaget watched his own children and others engage in this kind of "sensorimotor" play as he formulated his theory of how humans develop knowledge. Babies' play, he believed, was the foundation for all later learning. To him, babies were like small scientists who experiment with their bodies and the world around them as they invent knowledge. Although healthy babies tend to play whenever and wherever they can, there are some ways that parents can help turn ordinary moments into fun learning opportunities.
Create a playful environment. Babies don't need toys as much as they need time and a child-safe space to discover themselves and their surroundings.
Let play happen. Don't over plan for play or structure too many activities for a baby or toddler. Quiet time and shared interactions that follow from baby's natural body movements and actions are the best ways to help a baby learn through play.
Both interactive play and individual playtime are important ways a baby learns. Diaper changing games and those invented together during bath time and mealtime are wonderful ways to interact and help your baby learn about the routines of life.
Support a baby's playtime. Talk with children about their play, be sure they have time for their own inventions and fantasies, and appreciate playtime in your own life.
Learn about play. Go to the U.S. Department of Education's Website and conduct a search for "play" for articles about playtime throughout a baby's development.

Growth chart

Look at any class picture, and you'll see kids of the same age in all shapes and sizes. Some kids look tiny next to their peers, while others literally stand head and shoulders above their classmates.
As easy as it is to make these comparisons and to draw conclusions about what you see, the reality is that kids grow at their own pace. Big, small, tall, short — there is a wide range of healthy shapes and sizes among children.
Genes and lifestyle factors like nutrition and physical activity play big roles in kids' growth and development. And those issues can vary widely from family to family.
So how does a doctor figure out whether a child's height and weight measurements are "normal"? Whether he or she is developing on track? Or whether there are any health problems that are affecting growth?
A doctor uses growth charts to help answer those questions. Here are some facts about growth charts and what they say about your child's health.
Why Do Doctors Use Growth Charts?
Growth charts are a standard part of any checkup, and they show health care providers how kids are growing compared with other kids of the same age and gender. They also allow doctors and nurses to see the pattern of kids' height and weight gain over time, and whether they're developing proportionately.
Let's say a child was growing along the same pattern until he was 2 years old, then suddenly started growing at a much slower rate than other kids. That might indicate a health problem. Doctors could see that by looking at a growth chart.
What Factors Affect a Child's Growth?
Genetics, gender, nutrition, physical activity, health problems, environment, and hormones all influence a child's height and weight.
If a Growth Chart Shows a Different Pattern, Is There a Problem?
Not necessarily. The doctor will interpret the growth charts in the context of the child's overall well-being, environment, and genetic background. Is the child meeting other developmental milestones? Are there other signs that a child is not healthy? How tall or heavy are the child's parents and siblings? Was the child born prematurely? Has the child started puberty earlier or later than average? These are all factors that the doctor will use to help understand the numbers on the growth chart.
Are All Kids Measured on One Growth Chart?
No. Girls and boys are measured on different growth charts because they grow in different patterns and at different rates.
And one set of charts is used for babies, from birth to 36 months. Another set of charts is used for kids ages 2 to 20 years old. Also, special growth charts are used for children with certain conditions, such as Down syndrome.
Commonly used standard growth charts include:
Ages birth to 36 months (3 years):Girls' length- and weight-for-ageBoys' length- and weight-for-ageGirls' head circumference-for-age and weight-for-lengthBoys' head circumference-for-age and weight-for-length
Ages 2 to 20 years:Girls' stature- and weight-for-ageBoys' stature- and weight-for-ageGirls ' weight-for-statureBoys' weight-for-stature
What Measurements Are Put on Growth Charts?
Up until the time babies are 36 months old, doctors measure weight, length, and head circumference.
With older kids, doctors measure weight, height, and body mass index (BMI). It's important to look at and compare weight and height measurements to get a full picture of a child's growth.
Why Is Head Circumference Measured?
In babies, head circumference (the distance around the largest part of the head) can provide clues about brain development. If a baby's head is bigger or smaller than most other kids', or the head circumference stops increasing or increases quickly, it may indicate a problem.
For example, an unusually large head may be a sign of hydrocephalus, a buildup of fluid inside the brain. A head that's smaller than average may be a sign that the brain is not developing properly or has stopped growing.
What Are Percentiles?
Percentiles are measurements that show where a child is compared with others. On the growth charts, the percentiles are shown as lines drawn in curved patterns. When doctors plot a child's weight and height on the chart, they see which percentile line those measurements land on. The higher the percentile number, the bigger a child is compared with other kids of the same age and gender, whether it's for height or weight; the lower the percentile number, the smaller the child is. For example, if a 4-year-old boy's weight is in the 10th percentile, that means that 10% of boys that age weigh less than he does and 90% of 4-year-old boys weigh more.
How Are Percentiles Determined?
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) created the growth charts that are most commonly used in the United States. They were last updated in 2000. After collecting growth measurements from thousands of U.S. children over a period of time, the CDC was able to show the range of these measurements on one chart, using percentile curves.
Being in a high or a low percentile does not necessarily mean that a child is healthier or has a growth or weight problem. Let's say that 4-year-old boy, who is in the 10th percentile for weight, is also in the 10th percentile for height. So 10% of kids are shorter and weigh less than he does, and most kids — 90% — are taller and weigh more. That just means that he's smaller than average, which usually doesn't mean there is a problem. If his parents and siblings are also smaller than average, and there are other signs that he's healthy and developing well, doctors would likely conclude that there's no cause for concern.
What's the Ideal Percentile for My Child?
There is no one ideal number. Healthy children come in all shapes and sizes, and a baby who is in the 5th percentile can be just as healthy as a baby who is in the 95th percentile. Ideally, each child will follow along the same growth pattern over time, growing in height and gaining weight at the same rate, with the height and weight in proportion to one another. This means that usually a child stays on a certain percentile line on the growth curve. So if our 4-year-old boy on the 10th percentile line has always been on that line, he is continuing to grow along his pattern, which is a good sign.
A few different growth chart patterns might signal a health problem, such as:
When a child's weight or height percentile changes from a certain pattern it's been following. For example: If height and weight consistently are on the 60th percentile line until a child is 5 years old, then the height has dropped to the 30th percentile at age 6, that might indicate that there's a growth problem because the child is not following his or her previous growth pattern. Many kids may show changes in growth percentiles at certain points in development, when it's normal for growth rates to vary more from child to child. This is particularly common during infancy and puberty.
When kids don't get taller at same rate at which they're gaining weight. Let's say a boy's height is in the 40th percentile and his weight is in the 85th percentile. (So he's taller than 40% of kids his age, but weighs more than 85% of kids his age.) That might be a problem. On the other hand, if he's in the 85th percentile for height and weight and follows that pattern consistently over time, that usually means that he's a normal child who's just larger than average.
If you have any questions about your child's growth — or growth charts — talk with your doctor.

0ne year baby

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Baby's First Year
BirthJanuary 30, 2000Meet Kobe. He was born on January 30, 2000 at 1:35am. Here he is on January 31, when he is about 36 hours old. He is a developmental powerhouse waiting to explode. Already he is alert and trying to figure out how things work in his new environment. Most of his movements are uncoordinated or involuntary reflexes.
-->Almost Two MonthsMarch 28At two months, Kobe has already changed quite a bit. He's lost that newborn look and he has developed more control over his body. He is beginning to interact with his world.
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Six MonthsAugust 10Look at Kobe! He can sit up and may begin to crawl. At home he is beginning to feed himself. He loves to play. At this age, most babies can sit up, roll over and grasp objects in their hands.
-->Nine MonthsNovember 8Watch out world, Kobe is mobile! He can get himself where he wants to go and he is so proud of himself. He loves to play peek-a-boo, and he can wave bye-bye and blow kisses to his mom when she goes to work.
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One YearJanuary 30Happy Birthday Kobe! He is "cruising" around the house—walking as he holds on to things. At this age, babies may take a few steps on their own. Although Kobe speaks only a few words, he can certainly let Mom and Dad know what he wants with gestures and sounds.

11 month baby

YOUR ACTIVE 11-MONTH-OLDBaby talk -- it's so sweet and yet so important to a lifetime of communication for your child. Isn't it amazing how much baby's connecting with the world around him? And he needs your help more than ever to learn about the language of life.
Milestones this month Helping your baby master the wonderful world of words


Milestones this month*
Your baby now walks while holding onto furniture.
He uses the "pincer grasp" to pick up tiny objects between his thumb and forefinger.
Baby can stand alone.
He drinks from a cup.
Baby says "mama" and "dada."
He says a few other one-syllable words (like "hi").
Baby communicates his wants with gestures and words instead of cries.
He talks in conversational gibberish. *All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 11-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that he will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development, discuss them with her doctor.
Helping your baby to master the wonderful world of words
Talk simply, talk often Use simple, one-word labels to identify every component of your child's life. Go for a stroller ride and point to every tree, flower, or bird you pass by. Continually name all the objects in his bedroom and the toys in his closet. And use your baby's name often so he develops a real recognition for it.
Listen Patiently listen as he weaves an incomprehensible tale, then respond appropriately and courteously. Try to pick out "real" words, then say them back to your child as a way of trying to understand him.
Introduce concepts Point to objects and describe them as big or little, empty or full, up or down. Illustrate ideas with objects or actions whenever possible.
Name colors When you label objects, identify their color.
Name numbers When you talk about objects, identify how many there are. ("You are wearing two blue socks today.") Sing counting songs like "This Old Man."
Don't always put words in your baby's mouth Instead of saying "I'll bet you'd like a snack," ask "Would you like a cracker or a piece of cheese?" This allows him to answer, either verbally or with hand gestures. Repeat his response: "You chose a cracker -- here you are."
Share the world of books with your baby Reading to your baby is among the most precious gifts you can give him. Make it a part of your daily routine; snuggling up with a few age-appropriate stories before nap time or bedtime will help both of you relax as it strengthens your bond and shows baby the wonder of words. \
My, how you've grown!
As impossible as it must seem, your baby has experienced almost an entire year of life. So many changes have sprung up at every turn, all leading you to even more fun and fulfillment. Only yesterday, baby just fit into the crook of your arm; today, he may be walking (which, of course, means that running is imminent).
Monitoring your baby's growth provides a constant in a world of change. As you record his monthly height and weight, you'll gain comfort in knowing that your little one is on a strong and healthy course.
During the eleventh month, it's common to notice a slight slowing in his growth. If your baby was larger than average at birth, he's probably now moving closer to his more genetically predisposed size. If you and your partner are short, it's only a matter of time before your baby drops down from the 90th percentile in height.
Most doctors are less concerned about graphs than they are about your baby's overall health. If he's eating, sleeping and maturing at a normal rate, the numbers on a chart don't mean quite as much.On the go baby
Because your baby is more mobile, you may be more inclined to include him in outdoor family activities.
Bicycling Make sure baby sits in a bicycle seat that has a safety belt. The seat should attach over the rear wheel and have spoke guards. It should have a high back and some support for his head. Bicycle helmets are available in infant sizes. Your baby always should wear a helmet, as should every member of your family.
Strolling Make sure your baby is safely secured in the stroller with both a seat belt and a strap between his legs. The stroller should have a brake to lock the wheels so it won't roll off unattended. Look for a stroller with a wide base and a basket that hangs at a low level to prevent tipping.
Shopping The same precautions apply whenever your baby is seated in a grocery cart. Use either the attached safety belt or a baby carrier designed specifically for shopping carts.

10 month baby

YOUR ACTIVE 10-MONTH-OLD About this time, your little one -- who not so long ago was content to lie on the floor and watch the world go by -- is crawling everywhere, standing by herself, and possibly trying to take her first solo steps. There's no stopping her now! Grab the camcorder before she's out of sight!
Milestones this month Fancy footwork Thanks for the memory


Milestones this month*
She can walk while holding onto furniture.
Baby can stand alone, possibly for a few minutes.
She drinks from a cup.
Baby plays pat-a-cake or waves good-bye.
She understands the meaning of "no."
Baby says "mama" or "dada."
She expresses herself with gestures and sounds instead of cries.
Baby can roll a ball to you.
She uses gibberish in a conversational way. *All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 10-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that she will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development, discuss them with her doctor. Fancy footwork
Shoeless is cool You may wonder what's the appropriate footwear for your newly mobile baby. Most doctors recommend nothing. Your baby's feet develop best when they're bare; this helps build arches and strengthen ankles. But if you're looking for protection while you're outdoors, choose low-cut baby shoes with flexible soles, flexible uppers, flat nonskid bottoms and a roomy fit.
Stepping up Your active 10-month-old probably also has discovered stairs -- and how to climb them. Most likely, baby knows how to go up but not how to come down. Encourage her to crawl up the stairs, but make sure you're planted close behind her. Do the same as she maneuvers her way back down; help baby put her knees and feet in the proper positions for the trip back down. Never leave your child unattended on or near stairs; those tumbles can result in serious injury.
Exercise cautiously As your baby grows stronger and more active, it may be tempting to introduce her to some of the exercise opportunities outside your home. Before you engage in any "baby workouts," though, there are some things to consider:
Infant swimming Use these classes to help your child become comfortable in the water; your baby isn't quite ready to learn the breaststroke!
Baby exercise classes or videotapes Look for fun activities that provide socialization, not competition. Avoid those that promote passive motion (where you move your baby's limbs), stretching or any techniques that are aimed at improving strength, conditioning or coordination. These exercises could cause serious injuries to an infant's still-developing bones and joints.
Jogging Although running with your baby in a backpack may sound like a great bonding opportunity, keep in mind that the bouncing, jarring motions could injure her head or back. Also, you'll put her at risk if you fall or run into someone. Thanks for the memory Baby also may remember events. A song played on a carousel may trigger memories in your child when she hears it played later on a cassette tape. Though she may not be able to tell you in words that she recalls the song, her excited smiles and facial expressions will say it all. "Out of sight, out of mind" no longer applies. If your child has ever enjoyed unrolling the toilet tissue that sits on the other side of the cabinet door, she'll remember the pleasure every time she passes the door

9 month baby

YOUR INTENT 9-MONTH-OLDYour baby now loves to play games. He'd rather not go to sleep. And he loves to practice "walking" while holding on to a steady yet movable object (like a laundry basket)! Your 9-month-old is starting to have "a mind of his own." Isn't it wonderful to see your child seeking some independence?

Milestones this month*
Your baby now can pull himself up to a standing position from sitting down.
He can stand while holding on to someone or something.
Baby uses the "pincer grasp," holding tiny objects between his thumb and forefinger.
He can walk while holding onto furniture.
Baby drinks from a cup.
He can stand alone for a few seconds or perhaps longer.
Baby says "mama" or "dada."
He understands the meaning of "no."
Baby responds to simple commands (such as "Give Mommy the toy"). *All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 9-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that she will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development, discuss them with her doctor. Skip that morning nap? Your baby's newfound independence may lead him to try to overthrow your sleep rules -- at nap time and at bedtime. At 9 months, he may start to wean himself from a morning nap. Be supportive, unless he just can't make it to lunchtime without being fussy and overtired. Bedtime rituals
Don't be surprised if your usually complacent baby starts refusing to go to bed. To keep the house calm at night, try these tips:
Establish bedtime rituals that relax your baby. Give him a warm bath, read him a book, listen to soothing music, or rock him in a chair and cuddle.
Don't rock him to sleep. Wait until he's very relaxed and drowsy but still awake before you put him in the crib. You want him to learn to fall asleep by himself.
Once the baby is in his crib, leave the room. Even with his eyes closed, he'll sense your presence, and that will alert and distract him.
Encourage your baby to become attached to a particular doll, stuffed animal, or blanket. Make sure it's with him when he goes to bed. Eventually, sleep will come easily again. And it should, for all the miles your baby's now putting on during the day. Playtime
Though it may be a bit too soon to break out the board games, your baby is more than ready to play lots of fun games with you. And while keeping him entertained is important, so are the social, language, and coordination skills he'll learn from these games. Here are some fun examples of activities you can share:
Peekaboo: Cover your face with a blanket or your hands, or hide behind something. Call out "Where's Mommy?" and then uncover your face and say "peekaboo!" You're guaranteed plenty of giggles -- and lots of requests for encores.
So big: Ask your baby how big he is, then indicate it by spreading your arms (and his) wide and reciting, "So-o-o-o big!"
One, two, buckle my shoe: This is a great opportunity to begin counting with your child, either with his fingers or while climbing stairs. "One, two, buckle my shoe. Three, four, shut the door. Five, six, pick up sticks. Seven, eight, lay them straight. Nine, ten, start again."
Face fun: It's hard to find a baby who doesn't love pointing to (and pulling on) your facial features. Turn this into a game by making funny noises for each feature; remember to repeat the feature's name each time ("This is Daddy's nose") so you'll reinforce the labels and language

8 month baby

YOUR CRAWLING 8-MONTH-OLDTake time to celebrate your baby's latest milestone: Crawling. And keep in mind that crawling means different things to different babies. One may be content to continue scooting along on her tummy. Another may navigate by walking on both hands and feet, her bottom pointed toward the sky. And yet another may be able to master a route using her hands and knees.
Milestones this month*
Your baby now can crawl or scoot on her stomach.
She can sit without support.
Baby can "rake" a small toy toward her on the floor and pick it up.
She can get into a sitting position from her stomach.
Baby can pull up to a standing position from a seated one.
She walks by holding onto furniture.
Baby can stand alone (for at least a few seconds).
She looks for dropped objects.
Baby shows unhappiness when you take something away.
She plays peekaboo.
Baby can say, "mama" or "dada."
She plays patty-cake and waves good-bye.
Baby understands the meaning of "no." *All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 8-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that she will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development, discuss them with her doctor. Where the action is Your baby's new mobility means that it's time to further baby proof your home. Your baby will display an uncanny knack for finding any small item left lying on the furniture or floors -- and for putting it immediately in her mouth. Likewise, dropping her favorite items, picking them up, and putting them back in her mouth will be a favorite pastime. Remove any pacifier, bottle, toy, or food item that's been dropped before it finds its way back into your baby's open mouth.
A change in temperament Just a few months ago, your baby was a social butterfly. But these days you may notice a change in her happy-go-lucky disposition, and ask yourself:
Why is she so afraid of everything?
Why do her surroundings seem to intimidate her?
Why does she sometimes howl in terror at the sight of even close family friends and caregivers? Helping your baby find comfort in new surroundings
Hug and talk softly. Don't push your baby into situations with others if she's afraid. As you approach others, give baby little hugs and quietly tell her who's ahead. Alert the others to her anxieties, and ask them to move slowly. Suggest they talk to baby quietly and smile often, rather than pick her up or hug her. Remember -- even the sudden movements or loud laughter of others can panic her.
Accept separation anxiety, and move on. Your baby wants to be with you, so she may fall apart when you leave the room. Sometimes your baby even may lose control when her dad is left in charge. The good news is that most times, once you leave the room, your baby is just fine with another familiar face. If her separation anxiety is serious, you may have to limit your time away from your baby until she passes through this phase.
Let her find security. Now that your baby knows she's her own person and not a part of you, she may find that scary. She may attach herself to something else that brings her comfort -- a blanket, a pillow, a pacifier, or a doll -- something that doesn't walk away from her. Don't make an issue of it, but limit its use to the home or bedtime. And keep it clean, even if you have to throw it in the washer while your child is asleep. Don't allow her security object to be a bottle of milk or juice -- sucking on these liquids for long periods of time, especially during the night, can cause tooth decay.

7 month baby

YOUR STRONGER 7-MONTH-OLDFrom day one, your baby has maintained that special spot in your heart. But by month seven, he knows it and he intends to keep it that way. Baby will push the limits in all his activities; in fact, he's already learning how far he can go. Why is it that your childcare provider considers him an angel at lunch but he throws sweet potatoes at you at dinner? It's because baby knows that your love and acceptance (if not your patience) are endless. Keep in mind that it's good for baby to start maintaining some control over his environment, but as his parent, you need to determine how far he can go. Milestones this month*
Your baby now can bear weight on his legs when you hold him upright.
He can sit without support.
Baby can stand while holding onto someone or something.
He can pull himself up to a standing position from a seated one.
Baby walks by holding on to furniture.
He babbles.
Baby plays peekaboo.
He plays patty-cake.
Baby waves good-bye.
He can say "mama" or "dada."*All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 7-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that she will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development, discuss them with her doctor. Ready for action As your baby cruises through his seventh month, he's more aware of how strong he is -- and how that strength can get him where he wants to go. With strength comes your baby's desire to get moving, and he'll be crawling soon. Caution! Some parents buy baby walkers to help their little ones travel from room to room. Many doctors discourage the use of baby walkers. Too many emergency rooms have seen babies who've fallen down staircases while in a walker; walkers also can tip over or roll onto the fingers or toes of other children at home. Some doctors also believe that too much time in a walker can slow a baby's muscle development. Expect plenty of testing
Prepare yourself for the manipulation game. Your baby has learned that a mere squawk from his mouth will send you running; the insistent lifting of his arms all but guarantees you'll sweep him off his feet. Resist the temptation. Here's how to help your baby learn to entertain himself for short periods of time:
Devote short periods of time to him all day, or see that your child-care provider does. Sit down and read him a book, play finger games with him, or help him build a tower of blocks. Let him know you're always availableñbut just for limited amounts of time.
Provide a change of atmosphere if baby starts to fuss. Place baby onto a blanket on the floor or move him to another room. (Just make sure he's not fussing because he's tired, hungry, or in need of a fresh diaper.) Monitor his surroundings periodically, occasionally replacing the few toys that are within his reach. Don't let piles of toys accumulate around him; they can overwhelm him.
If his crankiness doesn't subside, go to baby and show him how to play with a particular toy or object, but don't sit down with him or pick him up. After a brief demonstration, go back to your own tasks. And don't hesitate to tell himñin a calm, pleasant voiceñthat you need to do your work, too. Keep chatting or singing to him as you busy yourself within his earshot; return to him if he threatens to erupt but before he actually starts to scream. (You don't want him to think that this is the ultimate way to bring you back to your senses.) Changing eye color Sometime between 6 and 7 months, your baby's eyes may change color. Until now, they've appeared blue. The amount of pigment in the eye's iris determines the permanent color, a pigment which may not be fully developed until your baby is closer to a year old. Blue eyes still could turn brown, but brown eyes won't become blue.

6 month baby

YOUR SOCIAL 6-MONTH-OLDThese days, your baby revels in her social-butterfly status. So take advantage of it. Expose baby to a variety of people during social outings; teach her to say "hi" and wave good-bye. While you're out and about, your baby will recognize her own name if it's called, and she'll turn to whoever calls it. When she wants to be picked up, baby will use not only her voice, but gestures like raised arms–and from a proud sitting position, no less. When you do pick baby up, be prepared for squeals of delight.
Milestones this month Sit up and take notice High energy Chitchat is good! Milestones this month*
Your baby now can sit on her own.
She rocks and pivots while lying on her stomach.
Baby can roll from her back onto her stomach–and back again.
She digs her fingers and toes into the floor to push herself toward a favorite toy.
Baby can eat a cracker.
She can pick up a cereal ring or other small object.
Baby has more than doubled her birth weight.
She can say vowel-consonant combinations.
Baby expresses unhappiness when an object or toy is taken away.
She can pass objects from one hand to another.
Baby looks for dropped toys.
She has discovered herself in the mirror, and loves having conversations with this new little friend. *All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 6-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that she will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development, discuss them with her doctor. Sit up and take notice This is the month most likely to see your baby sit on her own and gain a whole new perspective on the world around her. Once the teetering ends, baby will be able to reach for toys and play with them with perfect balance. If you're concerned that your baby isn't sitting up yet, keep in mind that some babies are closer to 9 months old before they master this skill. "Practice sessions" for sitting are helpful: Sitting on the floor, prop your baby up in the v-shape of your extended legs to help her get accustomed to this new position. And if your baby is still a bit on the chubby side, remember that it may be more difficult for her to keep her balance right now. High energy Aside from the temporary annoyances of teething, this phase of your baby's life is filled with boundless energy. Baby becomes a virtual wiggle worm when you attempt to feed or diaper her. Squirming and arching her back as you hold her are baby's ways of saying, "Put me down–I've got work to do!" Baby's also honing her fine motor skills, and water play can provide great training. If you include toy pitchers, buckets, and watering cans in her bath, you're sure to elicit both giggles and improved coordination. Any of the various commercially available activity boards also will help baby master several small motor skills. Many of these boards can be safely attached to the side of a crib, letting your baby entertain herself–and learn–before and after sleep time. Chitchat is good!
As your baby's happy talk becomes more precise, there are many ways you can help her develop her language skills:
Always speak slowly and clearly when you talk to baby.
Use short sentences and continue to identify objects, showing baby the objects as you say their names.
Repeat the sounds your baby makes. After a time, slightly alter the sounds and wait for her to repeat them to you.
Focus on repetition. Singing the same songs or reciting the same nursery rhymes not only entertains your baby, but the repetition will help her learn.
Read, read, and read some more. Ask your baby simple questions about the pictures in the books you read.
Don't talk at your baby. Give her time to respond–even if it's just in her own way.

5 month baby

YOUR ROCKIN' AND ROLLIN' 5-MONTH-OLD This month, your baby will be much more active as he begins to push-up and rock-and-roll around on his own. All that wiggling around even may help baby move forward or backward. One of your baby's favorite playthings this month may be his toes. He'll delight in reaching out and grabbing them to put in his mouth. While lying on his stomach, your baby will learn that he can crane his neck to see what's going on around him. There's a lot happening in the world, and he wants to see it all!
Milestones this month Coordination cues Strength training Sounds are golden Milestones this month*
Your baby is able to reach accurately for an object.
He can hold his head steady when sitting upright.
Baby can raise his chest with arm support while lying on his stomach.
He can roll over in one direction.
Baby can grasp a rattle.
He pays attention to very small objects.
Baby squeals with delight.
He spontaneously smiles.
Baby mimics sounds and gestures.
He turns towards the source of a sound or voice.
Baby gets attention by babbling.
He makes different sounds for different needs. *All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 5-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that he will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development, discuss them with his doctor. Coordination cues Your baby's ability to reach out accurately is a signal that his coordination is more keen. He now can transfer a toy or object from hand to hand. To reinforce this new talent while you change his clothes, encourage baby to transfer a favorite toy from one hand to the other as you put each arm in a shirtsleeve. With his increased control and dexterity also comes the ability–and inclination–to bring toys and other objects to his mouth. Your baby also is gaining a new understanding of how to grasp and hold objects. The way baby shapes his hand to grasp a round object will be different than the way he grasps a flat object like a page. Baby also will begin to use his hands more often to push away things he doesn't want, like that dropper full of medicine. Strength training Your baby's strength is increasing, too. He's now strong enough to roll over from his stomach onto his back, push himself up so part of his chest and stomach are off the floor, and rock himself on his stomach. Leg strength is growing as well. With you there to balance him, your baby is able to stand and support his own weight for short periods of time. Sounds are golden
This month, your baby will stay alert for longer periods of time, which means he'll need more attention from mom and dad than he did in months past. Keep these thoughts in mind as your family life begins to become more routine:
Your baby is becoming a better communicator. He may begin to mimic and express his own range of sounds based on his needs. You'll soon be able to tell whether or not these vocal gestures mean he's happy. If your baby wants attention, he'll babble away to get it. If you laugh every time he makes a cute little coo or sound, your 5-month-old will learn to repeat it to get your reaction.
Your baby also is learning to locate the source of your voice. Talk to him from across the room and he'll turn his head toward you. He'll begin to watch your mouth when you talk, and increasingly he'll be able to tell where your voice is coming from.
Your baby's new ability to distinguish and mimic different sounds and gestures are examples of his new vocal coordination and control. Vocal play can be an entertaining activity this month while you encourage and reinforce these new skills.

4 month baby

YOUR LAUGHING FOUR-MONTH-OLDWelcome to the world of the 4-month-old, where every day is filled with exciting new discoveries -- and constant reminders that your baby is preparing to take on the universe. About now, your baby's laugh is likely to be the most welcome sound in your home. She's truly learning to communicate with you and others around her. What fun!
Milestones this month What your baby is discovering Oh, sweet sleep Let's "chat"
Milestones this month*
Your baby can raise herself up on straightened arms while lying on her tummy and look all around.
She can grasp a rattle.
Baby laughs out loud.
She squeals with delight.
Baby smiles spontaneously.
She pays attention to very small objects.
Baby experiments by making new sounds.
She recognizes parents and siblings.*All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 4-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that she will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development, discuss them with her doctor.
What your baby is discovering
Hands Because baby can't crawl or walk yet, your little one literally is trying to pull the world toward her. You may notice baby intently studying her hands; at some point, she'll bravely stuff them into her mouth, surprising herself with the knowledge that these fascinating appendages actually are part of her! Once your baby has mastered this skill, she'll try the tricky stuff -- grabbing one hand with the other and then pulling them apart.
Toys New skills call for new toys. Your baby will love brightly colored, squeaky toys; soft, bumpy textures are good, too. Give your baby toys with knobs, handles, and loops -- anything that provides an easy grip. Look for safe baby toys that are one solid piece; stay away from those with small parts and ones that could fit entirely into her mouth. Crib gyms and play gyms are great at this age. Your baby can lie under them and squeeze, bat away, or kick at the brightly colored objects that hang within her reach. Mirrors and bells are popular attractions on these gyms, too. Be sure to check the toy package label for information regarding age appropriateness.
Laughter Maybe it's a high-pitched giggle or a rumbling belly laugh, but the first few times it erupts from her mouth, your baby may surprise herself. Your positive reactions to her peals of laughter will let her know that she's truly making a joyful noise. Oh, sweet sleep Your baby's increased activities also may account for another major 4-month developmental step: She's starting to sleep on a schedule! Most 4-month-olds are sleeping through the night for about nine hours at a stretch. This means that her daytime sleep probably is more predictable now, too -- typically morning and afternoon naps that each last for two to three hours. Keep in mind that your baby still may stir often during the night, make little noises or perhaps even awaken. If she's not fussing, it's best to leave her alone so she can learn to put herself back to sleep. If she can't fall back to sleep on her own, try speaking softly or patting her first. If that doesn't work, lift her out of the crib for a feeding or diaper change. Keep the lights low, and talk softly and as little as possible. Try not to turn this break into playtime; the more relaxed she is, the more likely she'll fall back to sleep soon. Let's "chat"
Your 4-month-old is finding all sorts of ways to communicate:
She's becoming your family's one-baby band as she tries lots of new ways to connect with you and satisfy her own curiosity. Baby's babbles, though not ready for the Top 40, may have a definite singsong quality to them. Brace yourself for a high pitch and lots of repetition.
"Ah goo" or similar vowel-consonant combinations will make up her vocabulary, along with some carefully chosen "oohs" and "ahs." Answer her with the same tones and inflections; she'll love this chat time -- especially if you spice up your end with facial expressions and gestures. These will be her first lessons in learning the art of conversation!
Baby's smiles will become more frequent; she may even fake a cough to get your attention. Always take the time to acknowledge these attempts at socializing. You'll know when baby especially wants to visit with you by the look in those bright, eager eyes.
Baby also will soon learn how to let you know when she's not in the mood for parent patter. Her eyes may glaze over, she may cover her face with her arm, or she may turn her head away. Baby will begin to learn the power of the protest, too. She may cry out in anger or frustration if you test her patience, especially if you take something away from her.

3 month baby

YOUR SMILING THREE-MONTH-OLDAll the world loves babies -- especially when they smile. This is a magical time in your baby's life and your own, so enjoy every moment of it!
Milestones this month Finally: a little predictability! When baby cries Get ready to welcome a caregiver


Milestones this month*
Your baby can bring his hands together.
With a mighty effort, baby can raise his chest, supported by his arms, when he lies on his stomach.
Baby can roll over (one way).
He reaches for objects.
Baby can put some weight on his legs when you hold him upright.
He makes sounds like "ah goo."
Baby laughs out loud.
He squeals when he's happy.
Baby smiles spontaneously.
He can focus on very small objects.
Baby turns toward the sound of a familiar voice. *All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 3-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that he will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development discuss them with his doctor. Finally: a little predictability! Because your baby's nervous system is maturing as well, his internal clock is becoming better regulated. More-established patterns are surfacing; the baby's eating and sleeping habits now are more likely to fit into a routine. You'll also notice less crying. How nice! When baby cries One of the toughest decisions you may face will be about crying. Most experts recommend soothing those cries as soon as possible–at least during your baby's first few months. It's virtually impossible to spoil your new infant–hold and snuggle him continually. Coo with baby, too! As you watch baby grow and see how capable he is of entertaining himself, remember baby can use those same skills to calm himself when a crying spell occurs. If baby isn't able to calm himself, use toys, books, or music to comfort him rather than picking him up. Or direct his attention to his crib's mirror; it may distract him enough to calm him down. Get ready to welcome a caregiver By now, your baby is getting ready to meet the world head-on. And you may feel a bit more comfortable about leaving him with a familiar caregiver Helping him become accustomed to a new face and voice, even for just a short time, will help both of you become more independent.
Here are important instructions to share with your in-home caregiver:
How to comfort and calm your baby
Which are his favorite toys, books, and tapes
The most effective way to burp him
How to prepare your baby's bottle
The fine points of his eating and sleeping schedules
Where to find first-aid and emergency supplies
The phone number where you can be reached as well as other emergency phone numbers
Authorization forms that let your child receive emergency medical attention, if needed At 3 months, the "typical" baby weighs 13 pounds and measures 24 inches. But don't worry if your baby is smaller or larger. Babies, like adults, vary in size and shape. In fact, the "average" weight for a 3-month-old can range from 9 to 16 pounds and the "average" length from 22 to 25 inches.

2 month baby

YOUR COOING TWO-MONTH-OLDYour 2-month-old is now starting to pay more attention to her world. Most of all, baby loves the sound of your voice and follows it around the room with real concentration. Your different tones of voice fascinate her; she'll respond to your high-pitched, singsong tone just as readily as to your calm, soothing voice. Better yet, baby's already talking back with a variety of sweetly-pitched coos. But when baby isn't calm and cooing, she might be fussy. Ah, the mixed blessings of a 2-month-old!
Milestones this month Four ways you can help sharpen your baby's senses Four reasons why your baby may be fussy
Milestones this month*
Your baby can follow an object as it's passed over her face, looking in an arc about six inches from her face.
She steadily holds up her head.
Baby rolls over in one direction.
She can raise her chest using her arms for support while lying on her stomach.
Baby smiles when you smile at her.
She responds to loud sounds by becoming completely silent, crying, or acting startled.
Baby coos.
She focuses on very small objects, like raisins.
Baby may laugh out loud. She may even squeal. *All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 2-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that she will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development, discuss them with her doctor. Four ways you can help sharpen your baby's senses
Your baby may coo even more when you stimulate her senses by doing the following:
Add color Hang a brightly colored mobile over baby's bed.
Play music Introduce more upbeat, bouncy music during playtime. If baby grows anxious, end the music and soothe her in a calm voice.
Pay attention Watch your baby to see what attracts her and what frightens her. Try different tones of voice and songs.
Cuddle Don't worry about "teaching" her a thing or measuring her every millimeter of growth. All she really needs now is your loving attention.Four reasons why your baby may be fussy
Colic Affecting 10 to 20 percent of babies, colic causes babies to have periods of intense crying -- which can occur several times per week and last for several hours. You'll know it when you hear it: Colic elicits sharp cries and screams that aren't relieved by a dry diaper or another bottle. Colic often shows up more frequently during the late afternoon and evening.
Constipation Your baby's bowel movements should be soft; if they're hard and dry and resemble little pebbles and are infrequent, your baby may be constipated. Ask your doctor if small feedings of water can help soften the stools.
Intestinal gas One good way to avoid intestinal gas in formula-fed babies is to fill the bottle with one fluid ounce of formula more than you'll feed your baby. That way, she won't end up sucking on an empty bottle and allowing air to enter her intestines. Also, keep the bottle tilted at a 45-degree angle to reduce air.
Formula intolerance Your fussy baby may be having difficulty tolerating her formula. Babies are born with immature digestive systems that continue to develop and mature during the first 4 to 6 months of life. If she exhibits any unusual behavior after feeding (such as crying or fussiness), speak with your doctor. If you do decide to switch formulas, do so gradually

1 month baby

YOUR AMAZING ONE-MONTH-OLDAs small and fragile as your baby may seem, rest assured that your gentle loving caresses will provide for his most basic needs: to be loved and comforted by you.
Milestones this month Your newborn's natural reflexes Your baby's developing senses Snooze news Dinner!
Milestones this month*
Your baby can lift his head slightly for a few seconds when lying on his stomach.
He focuses his eyes on your face.
With his eyes, he'll follow an object moved about six inches above his face. *All babies have their own internal developmental timetable. If your 1-month-old hasn't yet reached these milestones, rest assured that he will in time. If you have concerns about your baby's development, discuss them with his doctor. Your newborn's natural reflexes
After nine months in the womb, your baby will be equipped to say hello to the world with these universal reflexes:
Grasp: His little hand will grip your finger when you stroke his palm.
Startle: When he's startled by a loud noise or a quick movement, your baby will thrust out his arms and legs, then draw them back and cry.
Rooting: When you rub the corner of your baby's mouth, he'll immediately turn toward your finger. This rooting instinct is what helps him to latch onto your nipple for feeding.
Sucking: Your baby is ready and willing to suck for feeding; sucking also comforts him.
Tonic neck: Lie your newborn on his side, and watch how he extends his arm and leg on the side he's lying on, and flexes the arm and leg on the opposite side.
Walking: Although he's far from ready for the real thing, if you support your baby upright in a standing position, you'll see him naturally try to step out. Your baby's developing senses At 1 month, your baby will be experiencing a symphony of the senses. What he hears and sees can make him quiet, agitated, satisfied or blissful -- sometimes all four emotions in the same breath!
Seeing: Your baby's vision tends to be nearsighted: he's able to focus best on objects eight to 15 inches away. Bold shapes and bold black-and-white patterns attract his attention. Place a mobile over his crib so your baby can follow its movements. He's already turning his head and eyes to look at you. And your baby also is trying out his mime talents by imitating your facial expressions.
Hearing: Your baby knows your voice well, and he responds to it by growing quieter or more excited. Speak to your baby or sing to him as you feed, diaper, rock, and bathe him. Your words will be his first tools of communication. From you your newborn will learn to speak and to listen. You'll also discover that babies like the sound of music; play soft lullaby tapes throughout the day and at bedtime to help him relax.
Touching: Your tiny one responds to your touch. Take advantage of the opportunities to be close-feeding, cuddling or just rocking. Respond to your baby's cries; this will help him learn very early that you're there to comfort and care for him. Snooze news During these first weeks, your little one will sleep -- and sleep -- and sleep. The average newborn logs 15 to 18 hours of sleep per day, often in the form of short naps. Though you're probably hoping that his longest sleep stretches will occur during the night, don't count on it, at least not for awhile. One way to move closer to that goal is to wake him if he sleeps for more than three to four hours at a time during the day. Dinner! Already, your baby anticipates mealtime. If you're breastfeeding, plan to nurse him every two to three hours. You'll know he's getting enough to eat if he seems satisfied following the feeding, if he continues to have wet diapers and stays within a normal growth curve. If your baby is taking formula from a bottle, plan on feeding him every three to four hours. Initially, he'll eat about two to four fluid ounces at each feeding, but gradually the amount will increase. As he begins to recognize your face, your voice and your touch, he's also building his fledgling memory bank. And before you know it, he'll express that recognition and trust with a big, beautiful smile -- incredible! Experts agree that breastmilk is best for your baby. Not only is it the most nutritionally complete food your newborn will ever eat, but it also benefits your baby in other ways. Even if you plan to bottle-feed formula to your baby, consider breastfeeding these first few days so your baby can benefit from this nutritious natural food.

Parenting multiples

Every book on parenting will tell you that life forever changes after the birth of a child. So parents of twins or higher-order multiples (triplets or more) can feel as if they've left the hospital and arrived home on a different planet.
Yet multiple births are more common than ever, as more couples have babies later in life or turn to fertility treatments, both of which increase the chances of having multiples. The incidence of twin and higher-order multiple births has climbed rapidly over the last two decades. Between 1980 and 2000, the number of twin births in the United States increased 74%, and the number of higher order multiples increased fivefold. Today, about 3% of babies in the U.S. are born in sets of two, three, or more. Most of these multiple births (about 95%) are twins.
The arrival of multiple newborns presents certain medical, logistical, financial, and emotional challenges for a family. But the upswing in twins, triplets, quadruplets, and more also means an increase in resources to help those families. Often, parents who are expecting multiples find that other families who've been through the experience are a great help.
Changes Accompanying the Birth of Multiples
Some of the differences in lifestyle that multiple births will require are easy to anticipate. Standards for household neatness will likely have to relax for a few years, unless you can afford to hire a house-cleaning service. You'll get a lot less sleep, as multiple babies require frequent feeding and care at night.
The financial impact also can be significant. Any costs associated with newborns — for diapers, clothing, food and medication, high chair, toys, car seats, etc. — are exponentially higher. Even the cost of health care for the delivery of twins is four times higher than with a single birth. Add to this the cost of expanded living space, a larger vehicle, and possibly part-time help in the home. One partner may even need to give up an income to stay home and take care of the babies.
Also, because of the high rate of disability in kids born as part of higher-order births, particularly those born prematurely, there's the possibility of having to manage the costs associated with caring for a child with a lifelong disability.
Though some stores give discounts for families who have twins or higher-order multiples, larger-scale donations of formula and diapers from major manufacturers are more rare than they once were. At the same time, family and friends with babies, social service agencies, nonprofit groups, and support groups can be good sources of hand-me-downs and can help you meet the needs of your babies.
Some changes may come as more of a surprise. Having less time for each individual baby can make you feel guilty or sad. These emotions can become even more complex if you already have other children. Any stress and fatigue associated with caring for your kids can sometimes have an impact on your relationship with your partner.
Yet despite all of the challenges, multiples also bring great rewards. You'll get the unique chance to love several babies at once and marvel at the relationship between them, which is a very special one. And there's a fascination surrounding multiples that is hard to deny.
Multiple Baby Basics
When caring for multiple babies, it's important to recognize the need to recruit extra help. Some families hire help, some rely on volunteered time from extended family members, neighbors, fellow parishoners, or support groups for parents of multiples. Before your babies are born, think about the levels, sources, and types of help that would feel the most comfortable for you and your family.
Volunteers could bring food, bathe babies, shop, clean, or babysit while you nap or get out of the house. They can even run errands for you. But also consider how comfortable you'll feel having other caretakers in the house, which can compromise your feeling of intimacy and privacy with your family.
Even though there's no one right way to raise your multiples, it might help to see what other parents have done. Look for a support group for parents of multiples in your town.
When you're setting up your network of volunteers, it's also important to keep in mind the health of your newborns. Infants born prematurely can be particularly vulnerable to respiratory syncytial virus (or RSV), a flu-like illness that can be highly contagious and cause serious health problems. Establish hand-washing procedures and other safety precautions around the house for your helpers. It's also important that those caregivers be familiar with any medical problems the infants have.
Feeding will consume a large chunk of each day. Multiples can be either breast- or bottle-fed successfully and each approach has passionate advocates. Breastfeeding offers nutritional and immunological benefits and is easier on the pocketbook. It works because the lactating breast functions according to the laws of supply and demand. The more a baby nurses, the more milk the mother's body produces. It's possible to nurse two babies simultaneously, but it may take some time to master. So if you choose to breastfeed, consider talking with a lactation consultant, who can show you basic positions to help you nurse your babies either two at a time or singly. It may also be helpful to pump and store breast milk so that your partner or other caregivers can help with the feedings.
Bottle-feeding may take some of the pressure off exhausted mothers, especially if you have more than two infants to feed. Some mothers use a combination of breast- and bottle-feeding to keep some of the benefits of nursing while still getting help with feedings. Whatever way you choose to feed your babies, you may want to track the feeding schedule on a bulletin board to make sure every baby gets enough.
Bathing multiple babies can be quite a challenge. Some parents bathe their children separately in the interests of both safety and one-on-one time. For higher-order multiples, though, this may be impractical. Your best bet is to recruit some help during bathtime. When the infants are older, it will become easier to bathe more than one at a time.
Dressing your babies in the first few months doesn't have to be a big production. Some parents color-code wardrobes to see at a glance whose clothes belong to whom. It may make sense to have multiples share some basic items of clothing, such as sleepers. As the babies get older, it becomes more important to give them their own clothes and establish their unique identities.
Sleeping is necessary for your sanity! Call on your helpers so you can get an occasional nap. Even if you get your babies on a synchronized sleep schedule, you'll only get a few hours of sleep at a time. This will not give you the resources you need to care for your babies.
Many parents alternate "night shift" feedings and take turns napping. You might also consider waking and feeding all the babies when one wakes up in the night. This helps you coordinate your babies' schedule and minimize your wake-ups.
Try to sleep when your babies do. Though it can be difficult to let go of the thousand other things you need to do, remember that your well-being is crucial to your ability to take care of your babies.
Parenting Issues With Multiples
It can be impossible to tell multiple babies apart when they first come home, so don't feel guilty if you mix yours up at first. Many parents leave the hospital bracelets on or get new ones. Others paint each child's big toenail a different color or color-code their clothes. As your babies mature and their personalities develop, it will be easier to tell the difference between them.
Parents often worry about making sure their multiples develop as individuals. Here are some ways to support each child's individuality:
give them distinctly different names
refer to them by name, rather than as "the twins" or "the triplets"
avoid dressing them alike as they get older
keep their clothes in different drawers
give them their own toys
give them separate gifts and cakes on their birthday
encourage them to pursue different interests and abilities as they get older
give them time apart
It may be difficult to avoid comparisons, especially when it comes to important milestones such as walking, first words, or potty training. If one child lags in a developmental area, consult your doctor to determine the standard age range for that skill. But if the delay isn't outside the typical limits, try not to pressure the slower sibling. It's likely that your child is very aware of the difference already.
As kids get older it's important that parents look at every child's strengths and help them develop a sense of mastery. Also, remember that some of these infants will have legitimate developmental delays, which should not be overlooked.
If you have older kids in addition to the multiples, it's important to attend to their needs and any difficulty they may experiencing related to having such special siblings. It's not uncommon for older siblings to feel envious of the attention that the new babies receive and to act out as a result. If possible, try to regularly set aside time to spend individually with older siblings.
Don't forget that you need to be taken care of, too. Feeling stressed and overwhelmed is completely normal. Be sure to find time for sleep, to be alone, and to pursue your own interests.
Mothers of multiples are more likely than other mothers to suffer from "baby blues" and postpartum depression. Baby blues may leave you feeling weepy, easily upset, or excessively worried. These feelings may last for a couple of days, but for some new mothers can go on for several weeks. In postpartum depression, these symptoms are more severe and longer lasting. A mother may feel despair, lose her ability to eat or sleep, or have thoughts of harming herself or the babies. If you experience any of these symptoms, seek a doctor's help immediately.
Maintaining Your Relationship
Not surprisingly, the demands placed on parents of multiples strain the best of relationships. With all your energy directed toward your children, there's often little left over for each other — yet this is just when you need each other most. Try to give each other breaks when you can and to ask what your partner needs each day. It can be very helpful to have an outlet for expressing your feelings. Support groups for parents of multiples can help, as can marriage counselors or clergy.
It's important that you do what you can to keep some couple time. Because it's often hard to leave multiples with one sitter, you might need to get creative. Some parents pack dinner, then strap their babies in their car seats and drive around until they sleep. Then they have a chance to dine al fresco in peace. Other parents go out half as often as they normally would in order to be able to afford two sitters when they do go out. Still others choose to start their evening later, after the babies fall asleep, so that one sitter is able to stay with the sleeping babies. Do whatever you're most comfortable with, but remember that spending time alone together is more a necessity than a luxury.
Special Multiples Behavior
Multiples may develop language more slowly than singletons. This is may be due to prematurity, birth weight, or other factors. In addition, twins and multiples may receive less individually directed speech from parents. It's important for caretakers to spend time speaking directly to each child, as well as reading to them and encouraging language.
Social skills can come earlier for multiples, simply because they've always been with siblings, but they may do less well in other groups. Parents may encounter problems separating multiples, so it's a good idea to occasionally separate them even at an early age. Also try to introduce other people into the mix, including other kids and adults. Still, multiples are built-in playmates for one another, and from early on it's apparent that their relationship is special.
Parenting multiples has its challenges, but the rewards are twice (or more!) as great.

Doctor of a child

Planning for a baby can be one of the most exciting times of your life, but also one of the most demanding times. Pondering names, redesigning spaces in your home, and getting all of the equipment an infant needs are just a few of the things that will consume many hours during pregnancy. Choosing the right health care provider should be included on your list of things to do before your baby is born.
What Are Your Options?
When it comes to medical care for your child, there are generally three types of qualified providers: pediatricians, family physicians, and pediatric nurse practitioners.
Pediatricians
Pediatrics is the medical specialty fully focused on the physical, emotional, and social health of children from birth through adolescence. The primary focus of pediatrics is on preventive health care.
Pediatricians complete 4 years of medical school, followed by 3 years of pediatric residency. To become board certified, a pediatrician must pass a written examination given by the American Board of Pediatrics. Pediatricians must recertify by taking examinations every 7 years. This means pediatricians keep up-to-date on changes in children's health care. A pediatrician also must take a certain number of continuing medical education courses each year to be eligible for license renewal in the state where he or she practices.
Some pediatricians have additional training in a subspecialty area such as cardiology, critical care or emergency medicine, or hematology. These specialists usually have 3 years of additional training after their residency to be board certified in their subspecialty.
Family Physicians
Family physicians must complete 3 years of residency after medical school. Family medicine residents train in pediatrics and several other areas such as internal medicine, orthopedics, and obstetrics and gynecology. They usually spend several months training in each area. Afterwards, they are eligible to take the certifying examination of the American Board of Family Medicine. They are also required to earn continuing medical education credits and take periodic recertification examinations.
Because they train in many areas, family physicians are qualified to care for patients of all ages. This means your child would be able to see the same doctor from birth through adulthood. It also means that all members of your family can receive their primary care from him or her. A family physician will know the medical histories of all family members and may also be more aware of the emotional and social issues within your family that can affect your child's health.
When seeking a family physician, be sure to ask about age policies - some family physicians see only a few children or don't see children younger than a certain age.
Pediatric Nurse Practitioner
Another type of child health care provider is the pediatric nurse practitioner (PNP). These professionals generally have earned a master's degree in nursing and have special training in obtaining medical histories, performing physical examinations on children, making medical diagnoses, and providing counseling and treatment. Like pediatricians, PNPs may specialize in a particular area, such as neurology or endocrinology. PNPs work closely with doctors in hospitals, clinics, and private practices. The numbers of PNPs is growing each year, and approximately 18,000 PNPs actively practice in the United States.
Some parents may be hesitant to have their child receive care from a PNP, possibly worrying that the PNP is less extensively trained in children's health care. These feelings are largely unwarranted. The presence of PNPs in the practice can have many advantages. Parents often find that PNPs spend more time with them than doctors discussing health and child care issues. Plus, if a PNP encounters a more complex medical problem, he or she is trained to consult the doctor. Still, if you want to see only the doctor or feel the doctor should be consulted after the PNP has seen your child, most practices will honor your request.
When and How Should You Start Looking?
Your search for a health care provider should begin well in advance of the due date of your baby. Babies often come early and you will want to do some research to help you find a health professional whose style and personality will complement your own.
A good time to begin your search is about 3 months before the baby is expected. If you're in a managed health care plan, your choice of participating doctors who provide primary care for children may be limited, so be sure to check the plan's online list. But be aware that paper lists get outdated quickly. If you have any questions about whether a provider participates in your plan or if you are interested in a doctor who is not on the list, it's best to call the health plan directly. Also call if your child has any special medical needs that would require an out-of-network doctor.
Once you know the limits imposed by your health plan, compile a list of candidates from people you trust - your relatives, friends, neighbors, and co-workers who share your parenting philosophies. Your doctor, obstetrician, or nurse-midwife can also be a good source for recommendations.
If you've recently moved to a new area, you may not have personal or social connections established to ask for referrals. In this case, you may want to contact area hospitals or medical schools for recommendations or ask the pediatric residents or nurses where they take their children. You can also request a list of board-certified pediatricians from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) and board certified family physicians from the American Academy of Family Physicians (AAFP). Local hospital "nurse line" referral services, the local medical society office, medical directories in public libraries, and the yellow pages may also be helpful.
Once you've gotten some recommendations, you can begin to check them out more thoroughly. In each state, a medical board investigates complaints against doctors and may take disciplinary action, ranging from citing a doctor for non-payment of certain administrative fees to suspending or revoking his or her license for criminal behavior.
Disciplinary action is rare but fortunately very easy for parents to uncover. In most states, the information is public and is posted by state medical boards on their websites.
Now you are ready to begin the interview process. Considering that this doctor will be the first to treat your baby, you will want to be sure that you feel comfortable with the doctor's personality, office staff, location, and environment. A prenatal appointment is an excellent opportunity for both parents to ask questions and get acquainted with the office staff.
During the interview, you should find out how the practice works by addressing the following topics:
What are the office hours? Flexibility of the doctor's schedule may be a concern, especially if you work outside the home; you may prefer a doctor who offers weekend and evening hours.
Is this a solo or group practice? If it's a solo practice and your doctor is not available on weekends or evenings, what are his or her coverage arrangements? If it's a group practice, ask about the qualifications of the other doctors in the office. Who will see your child if your doctor is on vacation or otherwise unavailable?
Does a PNP work in the office? How does he or she fit into the practice arrangement?
Which hospitals is your doctor affiliated with? Will your doctor come to the hospital when you deliver to examine the baby once he or she is born? If your baby needs to be hospitalized, who will care for him there?
How does the office handle phone inquiries during and after hours? Are special times set aside for parents to call in with questions or is there an open advice line (usually staffed by a "phone nurse") during working hours? How are after-hours calls handled? How quickly can you expect a call back from the doctor on call after you have contacted the answering service? Are after-hours calls routed to a "nurse-on-call" system? This is a service that employs a staff of nurses to give parents advice about how to handle most common childhood illnesses. If your child's illness is thought to be serious, the nurse will transfer the call to your child's doctor or a covering physician, or advise you to go directly to the emergency room. Otherwise, a record of the call will be relayed to your child's doctor the next day.
Is email an option for communicating with your doctor?
Will your child's doctor handle emergencies, or will your child be referred to an emergency room or urgent care center? Are these facilities equipped to handle pediatric emergencies?
Are lab tests done in the office? Most offices can perform basic tests, such as complete blood counts, urine testing, and rapid strep tests rather than send samples out to a laboratory.
What are the payment policies? This is especially important if you do not have prepaid health coverage. What are the fees for services? Must they be paid in full at the time of the visit or can payment plans be arranged?
What are the policies regarding referrals to specialists, in the event your child needs additional care? Is the doctor financially penalized by your health plan for referring patients to specialists, and if so, will this influence the doctor's referral practices? If you are in a health management organization (HMO), it's important to ask how your doctor handles out-of-network referrals.
Making a question checklist will help you organize your thoughts and be thorough during the interview. Some doctors offer group classes for expectant parents to learn about the practice and discuss newborn care, while others offer one-on-one interviews. Many insurance companies encourage these prenatal appointments or classes and will cover cost that may be involved; however, be sure to check with the doctor's office and your health plan about charges for meet-and-greet sessions to avoid surprise costs.
What Should the Doctor's Office Be Like?
The interview is a great time to observe office procedures. Scrutinize the reception area; how many children are waiting? More than a handful may mean overbooking, or it may simply mean the doctor is spending extra time with a patient who needs it. Is there a place where sick children can be separated from those in for a well visit? Is the area clean and child-friendly? Is the staff polite and considerate to patients in the waiting room and to people on the phone?
While you're waiting, talk to other parents to determine whether they are satisfied with the care their child is receiving. Is their child comfortable with the doctor? Do the parents feel confident the doctor is thorough and competent? The overall atmosphere in the waiting area will give you a good idea what the practice is like.
What Is the Doctor's Personality?
Another important aspect of the interview is getting a feel for the doctor's personality. Does he or she see parents as partners in a child's care? Is he or she patient and willing to explain things carefully? Do you get the impression that he or she would be supportive if you requested a second opinion? Are the doctor's age and gender important issues to you?
Good communication between a doctor and parent is essential to building a good working relationship. Is the doctor is a good listener who seems responsive to your concerns? Are you comfortable asking questions or do you feel intimidated?
You also should be sure that your parenting style matches your doctor's in the important issues. How does the doctor feel about circumcision? Breastfeeding? Alternative or integrative medicines or techniques? Use of antibiotics and other medications? Does the doctor focus on preventive care, including immunizations, child safety, and nutrition? Philosophical issues may not seem important before you give birth but if you consider that this doctor may see your child for years to come, agreement on larger issues becomes more significant.
Although you may feel overwhelmed with preparing for your baby's arrival, imagine how you'll feel after the baby is born. Choosing the right health care provider will help you feel confident your baby will be well cared for throughout childhood and beyond, and will ease some of the anxiety all new parents experience.

mom bonding with baby

Bonding is the intense attachment that develops between parents and their baby. It makes parents want to shower their baby with love and affection and to protect and nourish their little one. Bonding gets parents up in the middle of the night to feed their hungry baby and makes them attentive to the baby's wide range of cries.
Scientists are still learning a lot about bonding. They know that the strong ties between parents and their child provide the baby's first model for intimate relationships and foster a sense of security and positive self-esteem. And parents' responsiveness to an infant's signals can affect the child's social and cognitive development.
Why Is Bonding Important?
Bonding is essential for a baby. Studies of newborn monkeys who were given mannequin mothers at birth showed that, even when the mannequins were made of soft material and provided formula to the baby monkeys, the babies were better socialized when they had live mothers to interact with. The baby monkeys with mannequin mothers were more likely to suffer from despair, as well as failure to thrive. Scientists suspect that lack of bonding in human babies can cause similar problems.
Most infants are ready to bond immediately. Parents, on the other hand, may have a mixture of feelings about it. Some parents feel an intense attachment within the first minutes or days after their baby's birth. For others — especially if the baby is adopted or has been placed in intensive care — it may take a bit longer.
But bonding is a process, not something that takes place within minutes and not something that has to be limited to happening within a certain time period after birth. For many parents, bonding is a byproduct of everyday caregiving. You may not even know it's happening until you observe your baby's first smile and suddenly realize that you're filled with love and joy.
The Ways Babies Bond
When you're a new parent, it often takes a while to understand your newborn's true capabilities and all the ways you can interact:
Touch becomes an early language as babies respond to skin-to-skin contact. It's soothing for both you and your baby while promoting your baby's healthy growth and development.
Eye-to-eye contact provides meaningful communication at close range.
Babies can follow moving objects with their eyes.
Your baby tries — early on — to imitate your facial expressions and gestures.
Babies prefer human voices and enjoy vocalizing in their first efforts at communication. Babies often enjoy just listening to your conversations, as well as your descriptions of their activities and environments.
Making an Attachment
Bonding with your baby is probably one of the most pleasurable aspects of infant care. You can begin by cradling your baby and gently stroking him or her in different patterns. If you and your partner both hold and touch your infant frequently, your little one will soon come to know the difference between your touches. Each of you should also take the opportunity to be "skin to skin" with your newborn by holding him or her against your own skin when feeding or cradling.
Babies, especially premature babies and those with medical problems, may respond to infant massage. Because babies aren't as strong as adults, you'll need to massage your baby gently. Before trying out infant massage, be sure to educate yourself on proper techniques by checking out the many books, videos, and websites on the subject. You can also contact your local hospital to find out if there are classes in infant massage in your area.
Bonding also often occurs naturally almost immediately for a breastfeeding or bottle-feeding mother. Infants respond to the smell and touch of their mothers, as well as the responsiveness of the parents to their needs. In an uncomplicated birth, caregivers try to take advantage of the infant's alert period immediately after birth and encourage feeding and holding of the baby. However, this isn't always possible and, though ideal, immediate contact isn't necessary for the future bonding of the child and parent.
Adoptive parents may be concerned about bonding with their baby. Although it might happen sooner for some than others, adopted babies and their parents have the opportunity to bond just as well as biological parents and their children.
Bonding With Daddy
Men these days spend more time with their infants than dads of past generations did. Although dads frequently yearn for closer contact with their babies, bonding frequently occurs on a different timetable, partially because they don't have the early contact of breastfeeding that many moms have.
But dads should realize, early on, that bonding with their child isn't a matter of being another mom. In many cases, dads share special activities with their infants. And both parents benefit greatly when they can support and encourage one another.
Early bonding activities that both mom and dad can experience together include:
participating together in labor and delivery
feeding (breast or bottle); sometimes dad forms a special bond with baby when handling a middle-of-the-night feeding and diaper change
reading or singing to baby
sharing a bath with baby
mirroring baby's movements
mimicking baby's cooing and other vocalizations — the first efforts at communication
using a front baby carrier during routine activities
letting baby feel the different textures of dad's face
Building a Support System
Of course, it's easier to bond with your baby if the people around you are supportive and help you develop confidence in your parenting abilities. That's one reason experts recommend having your baby stay in your room at the hospital. While taking care of a baby is overwhelming at first, you can benefit from the emotional support provided by the staff and start becoming more confident in your abilities as a parent. Although rooming-in often is not possible for parents of premature babies or babies with special needs, the support from the hospital staff can make bonding with the infant easier.
At first, caring for a newborn can take nearly all of your attention and energy — especially for a breastfeeding mom. Bonding will be much easier if you aren't exhausted by all of the other things going on at home, such as housework, meals, and laundry. It's helpful if dads can give an extra boost with these everyday chores, as well as offer plenty of general emotional support.
And it's OK to ask family members and friends for help in the days — even weeks — after you bring your baby home. But because having others around during such a transitional period can be uncomfortable, overwhelming, or stressful, you might want to ask people to drop off meals, walk the dog, or watch any of the new baby's siblings outside the home.
Factors That May Affect Bonding
Bonding may be delayed for various reasons. Parents-to-be may form a picture of their baby having certain physical and emotional traits. When, at birth or after an adoption, you meet your baby, reality might make you adjust your mental picture. Because a baby's face is the primary tool of communication, it plays a critical role in bonding and attachment.
Hormones can also significantly affect bonding. While nursing a baby in the first hours of life can help with bonding, it also causes the outpouring of many different hormones in mothers. Sometimes mothers have difficulty bonding with their babies if their hormones are raging or they have postpartum depression. Bonding can also be delayed if a mom's exhausted and in pain following a prolonged, difficult delivery.
If your baby spends some time in intensive care, you may initially be put off by the amount and complexity of equipment. But bonding with your baby is still important. The hospital staff can help you hold and handle your baby through openings in the isolette (a special nursery bassinet) and will encourage you to spend time watching, touching, and talking with your baby. Soon, your baby will recognize you and respond to your voice and touch.
Nurses will help you learn to bathe and feed your baby. If you're using breast milk you've pumped, the staff, including a lactation consultant, can help you make the transition to breastfeeding before your baby goes home. Some intensive care units also offer rooming-in before you take your baby home to ease the transition.
Is There a Problem?
If you don't feel that you're bonding by the time you take your baby to the first office visit with your child's doctor, discuss your concerns at that appointment. It may be a sign of postpartum depression. Or bonding can be delayed if your baby has had significant, unexpected health issues. It may just be because you feel exhausted and overwhelmed by your child's arrival.
In any event, the sooner a problem is identified, the better. Health care providers are accustomed to dealing with these issues and can help you be better prepared to form a bond with your child.
Also, it often helps to share your feelings about bonding with other new parents. Ask your childbirth educator about parenting classes for parents of newborns.
Bonding is a complex, personal experience that takes time. There's no magic formula and it can't be forced. A baby whose basic needs are being met won't suffer if the bond isn't strong at first. As you become more comfortable with your baby and your new routine becomes more predictable, both you and your partner will likely feel more confident about all of the amazing aspects of raising your little one.

A Father

Becoming A Father

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As a new dad, your role is no less complicated than your wife's. No, you didn't have to carry the baby for nine months, but you did have to make adjustments physically and emotionally as the due date approached and preparations for the baby became all important. On one hand, you may have felt as if you had nothing to do with this birth; but on the other, this is very much your baby, too.
Father's Conflicting Emotions
When the baby finally arrived, you may have been tremendously relieved as well as excited and somewhat awed. In witnessing your baby's birth, feelings of commitment and love may have surfaced that you had worried you might never feel for this child. You also may experience a greater admiration and love for your wife than you ever felt before. At the same time, contemplating the responsibility of caring for this child for the next 20 years can be more than a little unnerving.
The best approach to deal with these conflicting emotions is to become as actively involved in fathering as possible. For example, depending on the hospital and your own schedule, you may be able to "room in" with mother and/or child until it's time to bring the baby home. This will help you feel less like a bystander and more like a key participant. You'll get to know your baby right from the start. It also will allow you to share an intense emotional experience with your wife.
Once the entire family is home, you can and should help diaper, bathe and comfort your baby. Contrary to old-fashioned stereotypes, these jobs are not exclusively "woman's work." They are wonderful opportunities for all of you - mother, father and even older siblings - to get to know and love this new family member.

Interacting with baby

INTERACTING WITH YOUR BABY
By Dorothy KnopperBabies are born so helpless, depending on us for every need. When do they understand the nuances in our touch, tone of voice, and facial expressions? When should we talk to them? Even before infants recognize our faces, they respond to being held, a gentle touch, and a mother's soft voice. They respond to music, words, being read to, and their names. It is important to talk to babies early on, when they are feeding, being diapered, driving in the car. One mother used diaper time to name all the people (and animals) in the baby's life--Mommy, Daddy, Granny, Brother, Nanny, Pets, etc.--in a singsong voice. Eventually the "People Song" became baby's favorite, and in a few months he was singing it himself. Another mother used morning feeding time to relate the day's schedule--morning walk, grandma coming to visit, doctor's appointment, trip to the grocery store, etc. The baby listened intently and eventually giggled at the mention of each event. A father used bedtime to read a story while cuddling baby in a rocking chair. It wasn't long before the baby pointed to a book before going to bed, needing that special time before falling asleep. Babies understand much more than we may think, and they react to pleasant routine, as in the above examples. Following are some suggestions to encourage early speech development, a feeling of well-being, and a pleasant and calm life for parents and baby:
Treat your baby as an individual, with specific characteristics and tastes. Call her by name.
Talk to your baby from early infancy in complete sentences. Use baby talk sparingly (for difficult words like "s'ghetti" for spaghetti, or baby's own version of multi-syllabic names).
Smile often--your baby will respond.
Try to figure out what your baby wants when he cries or is ornery - his needs are usually very specific and often simple, such as a certain toy, a diaper change, etc.
Be consistent. Both parents may not always agree, but they should discuss issues and compromise, if necessary, presenting a united front.
Enjoy your baby, but also be sure to take some time for yourself away from her, leaving her with a competent caregiver.
Too much love has never spoiled a child.